How to Negotiate: The Ultimate Guide To Getting What You want

Learning how to negotiate starts with knowing what you want. Try to ask yourself the question: What is it that you want out of this deal? A promotion? More money? Better business opportunities?

Whatever it is, make sure you focus on that specific goal. This will be of great importance later on during the negotiation. Now having set this goal, make a plan on how you to get there.

Determine Your Range

Before stepping into the negotiation arena, determine your minimum and maximum desired outcome. This will give you wiggle room to play with.

For example: If your negotiating for a pay raise, try to have a minimum offer in mind that you’re willing to settle with. If the offer falls below this threshold, you know you’re getting a bad deal. And you can comfortably walk away.

Also have a maximum in mind, this will be your starting point within the negotiation. And you can negotiate further down until the other party is willing to accept the offer, but never below the minimum.

Know What The Other Wants

You can’t get the most out of the negotiation if you don’t know what the other party wants. Therefore it is important to gain intel on the them.

Aks yourself the questions: Who are they? What do they want? How strong is their position? Do they have other offers on the table? What is their temperament?

If you can answer these questions you’ll have a map of the field you’re playing in. This will help you to navigate and adjust your approach accordingly.

Have Leverage

Now that you’ve mapped out the playing field. It’s time to asses your position. Try to find out how strong your position is in relation to the counterparty. In other words, what leverage do you have?

Look at what you’re bringing to the table and write down all the positive qualities you possess. Then take a look at what other options the counterparty has. If they have very few or no other options, then your position is strong and you can negotiate hard.

If they have many offers or more options, then your position is weak and you’ll have to soften your approach or abandon the deal completely.

Let’s take a couple of examples to illustrate this:

Example 1 – Strong position

You’re at a car dealership and you want to buy a car that is in low demand. The dealer here is eager to sell you this car, since the potential customers are few. Knowing that his position is weak and the car won’t sell fast, you can negotiate for a lower price. You have many options, while he has few. So the odds of him accepting your offer will be very high.

Example 2 – Weak position

Let’s say you want to buy a different car that is in high demand. The dealer is now in a much stronger position than you. Since he has a lot of buyers, he will be though to deal with. Knowing that you can’t get much out of it. And you’ll probably have to pay the full price. In this case your leverage is almost non-existent.

Support Your Offer With Solid Reasons

If your position is balanced or even at a disadvantage, you must try to convince the other party to accept your offer. The best way to do this is to support your offer with solid reasoning.

For example:

Let’s say you’re negotiating for a higher salary. You can give the following answer to support it.

“The reason why I’m asking for a higher salary is that in the last year I have expanded my skill set and proven my ability to perform well under pressure. Coupled with my experience in the field and my willingness to go the extra mile. I feel that what I’m asking is more than reasonable and a fair deal for the both of us.”

In the example above, if the conditions are true, than it would be very difficult for the other party to deny this argument.

You should make them feel like they’re getting the best value for their money. In the end it’s all about the exchange of value. Try to move the focus away from the dollar signs and concentrate on the value that you are bringing.

This way you won’t talk in numbers, but in value. And if your value is seen as more attractive than the value of their money, then you’ll win.

Make it a Win-Win

The best negotiations are those where both parties feel like they’ve gotten something out of it. You see in most cases your position won’t be as extreme as to dominate the negotiation.

The ratios are usually in the middle whereby both parties have something to gain and something to lose.

Now in order to persuade the other to accept your offer, you must give them something in return. It doesn’t always have to be in monetary terms, it could mean that you’re giving them an extra service or an accessory.

This also helps to progress the negotiations and break through a plateau.

It’s also important to leave space for the counterparty to play with. If your demands are too high, then the negotiations will come to a halt. And both of you will leave emptyhanded.

Instead try to aim for a sweet spot where the other party can accept most of your demands. And they don’t feel like they’ve been cheated.

Be Bold

Don’t be shy with your demands. Aim high and fight for your own best interests. You see most people will shy away from asking more, because they’re afraid of being seen as greedy. This is detrimental to your own position.

You see no one will fight as hard for you as you do for yourself. If you want something, than you must go after it. And being bold doesn’t mean, being rude.

It means being brave enough to want for yourself that which is best for you.

It’s a sign of self-worth and self-confidence. Others will notice that and will respect you for it. If your position is weak, then most likely you will be cheated on and you’ll be left with the pains of a bad deal.

Learn to Walk Away

You always want to keep the option open to walk away from the deal. This by default means to never go into any negotiation that leaves you with no option to say no.

In this case you will be completely dominated by the other party and you’ll always leave without a gain.

If the deal seems too good to be true,  which it most likely is. Then by all means walk away.

You can also use this as a negotiation tactic to make the other party cave in to your demand. If you’re willing to walk away, the deal is off the table. So it will be more attractive for them to take the deal. In which case you’ve won.

This won’t always work. But it’s definitely worth the try.

Always End On A Good Note

Remember the phrase: “you’re network is your net worth”? If you’re in the business of long term relationships, then it wise to apply this rule in your negotiations.

You see this one deal might lead you to more deals in the future. So it is wise to make the other person feel like they’ve gained something. Nobody likes to lose and if they feel like they’ve gained nothing, the door to any future opportunities will be closed.

You might also be getting access to the network of your counterparty. Which might be even more valuable than the particular deal itself.

So next time leave something on the table in order to gain more in the future.

Conclusion

The art of negotiation is a fine balancing act and a necessary skill for anyone who wishes to gain improve their lives. Whether you’re negotiating for a higher salary or dealing with your spouse.

Having the skills to persuade and getting the best value for yourself and those around you. Will leave you with a more fulfilling life and self-worth.